Dollhouse

Anybody that knows me knows that I am ALL ABOUT BUFFY.  Here's the story.

I completely ignored Buffy when broadcast.  Why would I want to watch some little white girl named Buffy no less, for an hour out of my life?  Please.  I'll pass.  I ignored it for 5 years.

Then...

I was home sick as a dog on, like, Thanksgiving or New Years Day or somesuch, and FX ran a marathon.  They didn't just run a regular marathon.  Apparently fans picked the episodes to air and the order.  I caught the two parter inaugural episodes of of Season 1 -- Welcome to the Hellmouth and The Harvest.

There is a scene in The Harvest.  Jesse, geeky friend to geeky friends Xander and Willow, has been turned into a vampire.  He's at the Bronze (local teen club), stalking Cordelia, the uber-popular girl bitch who in the past had been downright cruel in spurning his advances.  Vampire Jesse watches her dancing and when a slow song comes on, he walks over, takes her hand and starts dancing.  Unaware that Jesse is a vampire or indeed that vampires exist, Cordelia reverts to mean girl mode and says "Hello, Caveman Brain...." and continues to whine abuse at him.  He fixes his deep vampire sex eyes on her and says "Shut up," and Cordelia melts and says "Okay.  One dance."

I laughed my ass off and was hooked.  Despite my awful illness, I think I stayed up 24 hours watching every episode they broadcast.  I felt like the universe had let me down.  Why didn't anyone tell me Buffy the Vampire Slayer was like this:  well written tight as a drum story telling with suspense, humor and heartbreak.  I felt really cheated and kind of ashamed of myself that I judged the show so harshly based on the title and what I thought it was.  Bad.  Bad me.

The finale to Season 5, entitled "The Gift" is, in my opinion, the best hour ever written for television.  Watching each time, I whisper to myself "That's the bravest thing I have ever seen."

I gobbled up all things Buffy.  I descended into deep nerdy geekdom and started writing for a fictional role playing website (now defunct) called LA By Night, which based its environment on the Buffyverse but in which you designed and wrote your own characters.  The character I designed was a 200 year old vampire named Parasol.  Hmmm.  Maybe I'll revive her on an alternative blog.  She was a good character.

I wore my zombie cult follower badge proudly.  I proselytized about Buffy every chance I got, bringing several members into the fold.  I went to comic cons.  I paid big money to go to the John Kerry fundraiser creator Joss Whedon threw where I talked to him for, oh, 35 seconds and walked away renewed.  I got tix to the broadcast of the last episode at the Hollywood Athletic Club with about 1500 of my fellow zombie cult followers.  I found I liked my fellow zombie cult followers tremendously  -- conversations with those who shared my obsession were long, deep, thoughtful and bonding.  I bought books, magazines, action figures (yes, action figures that are STILL in the original packaging, you Philistines).  No.  I am not ashamed.

Every year, I hold a 10 day marathon of the entire series which, of course, I have on DVD.  Each year, I learn and see something new about the Buffyverse and myself.  What I perhaps glossed over last year when I watched, now has meaning and substance this year because of where I am in my life...even at 52.  No.  No.  I am not ashamed.

The creator of Buffy is Joss Whedon who, if you're going by me, is a god walking amongst us.  He can write the hell out of a scene and he gets women.  He gets how women relate to men.  He gets how women can't relate to men.  He gets how strong women are naturally.  He gets that women are no less human than men.  He gets me.  How do I know?  Because I cannot count the times I've been watching Buffy weeping bitter salty tears on my couch going "Yeah, Buffy girl.  I know.  I know.  I know."  And Joss wrote and created that.  He is brilliant and I throw the gauntlet at the feet of anyone who says otherwise in my presence.  No.  No.  No.  I am not ashamed.

(Here is an interview with Joss at Salon.)

He has a new series on Fox called Dollhouse, starring Eliza Dushku who played my favorite character in Buffy -- evil slayer Faith.  It premiers Friday.  Because I promised tribute to whatever entity governs television marketing, Hulu will have it up the next day.

I'll be stalking Hulu at 12:01 a.m. on Saturday morning.